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.This was the comfort she'd been craving since this whole thing started, and she wasn't about to abandon it so soon."What the hell kind of stupid question is that? I didn't know it was him then, but even so, I felt like someone was ripping my heart out of my chest."She moaned as if in pain."Now that I know it was Tucker, Jesus, I feel ten times worse than that.I love him so much, more than anyone on the planet.And I can't bear the thought that he did this just to watch me suffer." She began to cry again; a little surprised she had any tears left."He got his wish.It's b-b-een like eating ground glass to think about losing his and Malcolm's love."His mother's voice was so raw and pain-filled that Tucker's eyes misted over, despite the anger that still burned hot inside him.Katherine held her friend tighter."I don't think he hates you.I don't think he knew what he was doing.""He had to know this was killing me! What other point is there in blackmail!" Gwen's sobs shook her entire body, her stomach twisting."I think, I think I might be sick," she moaned."No," Katherine said firmly."You're not." At least I hope not."Take a deep breath.Again.Slower," she coaxed kindly."That's it."Gwen swallowed hard, letting all the pain, loss, and frustration she felt flow freely."I can never forgive myself for hurting him.Bu-but I didn't want him to know the truth."Tucker's jaw worked as he clamped down on his emotions.He forced himself not to say a word, though inwardly he was screaming at the top of his lungs."You married Malcolm because you were in love with him and not just because you were pregnant or you thought he was a good catch that you could trick.I know that for a fact." Katherine held her breath for a moment, balancing on a razor's edge before making her decision.She pulled back gently and framed Gwen's face with her hands."And you didn't want Tucker to know you'd been raped and that that's how you got pregnant."Tucker entire body jerked as though he'd been burned.Gwen nodded miserably, "But I'd rather he think that I cheated on Malcolm than know what really happened.It's better that he hates me than he thinks he was connected to something so brutal and ugly." Her face crumpled."I know this is all my fault.The lies.Everything.I know that," she said fiercely, her tears pouring over Katherine's hands."B-but it still hurts."A single tear seared a path down Tucker's cheek."I think you and Tucker broke each other's hearts." Though her lower lip was trembling, Katherine managed a tiny encouraging smile."But, please, please don't let things end there."Tucker pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes; tears spilling freely down his face.He couldn't stand it another second.He pressed his lips together but had to pause and force the word past the solid lump in this throat.He bent at the waist, feeling sick."M-Mom?" he rasped.Slack jawed, Gwen spun around on the bed, not believing her ears, then eyes."Tucker?"Katherine closed her eyes.Please, God.Gwen shook her head wildly, fearing the worst."What are you… Oh, God, what did you hear?" Her heart was beating so hard the words sounded like they were being said by someone else.Tucker pulled his hands away from his eyes, his handsome face twisted with pain and guilt."I-I heard enough." He rushed to the bedside and dropped on his knees in front of Gwen.There wasn't a second's hesitation, Gwen held out her arms and Tucker wrapped himself around her, crying every bit as hard as she had."I didn't mean to hurt you," Gwen whispered into his dark hair, kissing the top of his head over and over."I'm sorry," he said at the same time."I didn't know.I didn't–"Gwen nodded."Me, too."Katherine allowed herself to draw in a breath.She was shaking nearly as badly as Gwen and Tucker.She ran her hands through Tucker's hair and kissed the side of his head.Then she did the same thing to Gwen before going to the bedroom door and closing it quietly, with her still inside.They had a lot to talk about.* * *The Next Day…The members of the Mayflower Club stood in the gray light of morning outside the carriage house, not knowing how to say good-bye.A light breeze that spoke of colder days ahead ruffled their hair and dusted their cheeks with color.Tucker, Gwen, and Katherine had spent most of the Saturday afternoon in Gwen's room.There were neither raised voices nor blood curdling screams, so Jacie, Audrey, and Nina had minded their own business and spent the time catching up with each other and making new memories.That night they'd learned, much to Gwen and Katherine's embarrassment, that Tucker had been behind the blackmail.He'd been sure that his mother had cheated on Malcolm and then tricked him into getting married for his money.Filled with anger and stinging from the heinous deception, he'd thought it only fitting that his mother unwittingly finance his search for his biological father.A search made possible by a regular stream of blackmail funds and the services of two private detectives, who had consistently come up empty.When the truth was finally exposed, Tucker experienced a level of shame and regret that Gwen could intimately relate to.Their relationship was badly damaged, but not broken.Katherine would see to that.Gwen was still worried sick over how Malcolm would react to hearing about the rape and Tucker's parentage, but the time for deception was long past.She knew that now and was willing to accept the consequences of her decision to lie so long ago.It was time."So?" Audrey rocked back on her heels."We're not going to lose touch again, right?""No way," Katherine insisted, wrapping one her arm around her cousin, the other around Nina."Not after all this.I want the club back."Jacie smiled."I want that too.I especially want that with Nina." A beat."Only I want her to be naked at the time."They all laughed, but the moment was bittersweet as goodbyes usually are."I'll email you all," Gwen promised.She let out a shaky breath, fear still clinging to her like mustiness to an old house."Just pray you don't see my name in the papers under name changes."Nina pulled Gwen into a fierce hug."You're going to be okay, Gwen," she whispered emotionally."I've seen you be stronger than I thought possible.You can do it one more time.Malcolm will understand.He loves you too much not to." She pulled away to look her in the eye."We're only a phone call away."Gwen nodded, more than a little choked up at the sentiment.She could see Jacie smiling at her over Nina's shoulder and knew that emotion was echoed by the other half of this newly minted couple."I don't deserve that.""I know you don't," Nina answered honestly."But this is a weekend for second chances for us all." A small smile appeared."And you're one of us, remember?""So you're getting lucky," Jacie added softly.Sheepishly, Katherine wiped at her eyes."What about getting together again for a weekend or something? We could do that, sometime, right?"Gwen felt like a wrung out dishrag, and yet it was the happiest she'd felt in months."When?" she asked, kicking at a pebble near her feet, a sense of belonging that she hadn't felt in ages, carefully making its home.Katherine thought about that.It had been her suggestion, after all.Once they'd caught up on the happenings of each others lives, except for Nina and Jacie, who were still slobbering all over each other like hormonal teenagers, they'd all discovered they didn't have that much to say to each other.The time they'd shared had been great, but she didn't have the overwhelming need for another gathering until she had more to talk about.And a little time needed to pass for that to happen.They'd never see each other everyday again, or every week, or even every month.But that was okay.They were busy women who had demanding lives to match."What about this spring?" she finally said."It's nice before it starts getting humid and I'll get a few days off during spring break."Audrey frowned [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]