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.“But what?” I prompted, taking his hand again.“C’mon.We don’t want the Warden catching us out here again.” He led me toward the front doors but I pulled against him.“But what?” I repeated.“Rigel?” I could feel sadness and conflict from him, and it worried me.He tugged on my hand.“We can talk later—silently, if we have to.Let’s get to class.”It wasn’t an answer, but I could tell he didn’t want to say more when we were likely to be interrupted.Based on that conflict I felt, I suspected he also wasn’t quite sure what he wanted to say, and needed time to think about it.Frustrated and impatient, I accompanied him silently to Geometry, trying hard to keep my doubts to myself.Ms.Harrigan was already there, which meant no out-loud talking.But once class was underway, I thought to Rigel, What were you going to say earlier? Can you tell me now?Just trying to figure what’s best for you, M.We can’t let them screw up your life, but I don’t want to accidentally do that, either.We’ll talk later, for real.When?But he just shook his head, almost imperceptibly.I tried—hard—to tap into his thoughts, but either I wasn’t as good at it as he was, or he was better than me at shielding.All I got was a jumble of emotion—worry, love for me, some unfocused fear, but no clue to what he was actually thinking.I pressed my lips together and tried to focus on the lesson, even though math had never seemed more irrelevant.I was a little surprised neither Sean nor Molly showed up to walk me to second period, which meant Rigel could.“Okay, give,” I said as soon as I’d verified no one was close enough to hear—no one with Martian hearing, in other words.“What was that ‘but’? What makes you think you could possibly screw up my life?”Rigel gave a half-grin, but I could tell his heart wasn’t in it.“I know what you’re thinking, because I’ve been thinking it, too.But all the reasons we couldn’t run away before Thanksgiving still hold now, M.”“Before Thanksgiving, nobody was trying to make you leave town permanently!” I protested.“You got as sick as I did last week, Rigel.Maybe sicker.I’m not going through that again, and neither are you.”“They said—”“Yeah.Some so-called cure they don’t even have yet.Like I care.The sick part wasn’t the worst thing about last week.Not for me.” I left that hanging, almost a question.He sighed.“Not for me, either.Being apart from you, well, it just might kill me, even if their antidote works.But I won’t sacrifice your whole future because of my feelings.”“Then do it for my feelings.” My voice rose above a whisper and I tried to control myself.“How many times do I have to tell you, Rigel, you are my future!”He didn’t say anything else until we reached my classroom.Then he whispered, “Okay.If it really comes to a permanent separation, we’ll run.Meanwhile, lets both look for alternatives, okay?”“Okay.”Since no spies were around, he gave me a quick kiss—enough to make my heart race—then headed off to his own class.I didn’t see Sean or Molly at all until lunchtime.Rigel and I had agreed—silently, because of that new Echtran “expert” in Science—that we’d talk for real at lunch, if we got the chance.Since Sean wasn’t waiting to escort me like he’d been doing lately, we walked to the cafeteria together.We got our food, then Rigel went to the same table he’d sat at yesterday while I swung by my usual table to let everyone—especially Sean and Molly—know I planned to sit with him today.Instead of objecting like I expected, Sean nodded, then got up and walked part way to Rigel’s table with me.“M, I want to let you know I won’t.we won’t.try to keep you two apart anymore,” he murmured.“No matter what our mum says.I saw how sick you got last week and how much better you are now and I, well, I can’t be part of that.Making you suffer.”Startled, I looked up at him.The pain in his eyes made me wince, but he also looked determined.“Thank you, Sean.Thank Molly for me, too.”He gave a quick shake of his head, frowning now.“Don’t.This doesn’t mean I’m okay with—” He glanced at Rigel.“But I won’t.make you hurt.” For a moment he looked almost pleadingly into my eyes, then turned away abruptly and went back to his table, where the others were watching us curiously.I stared after him for a second, confused and a little disturbed.But I could worry about Sean later.Right now, I had a precious chance to talk with Rigel and I wasn’t about to waste it.“What was that about?” Rigel asked as soon as I joined him.“O’Gara telling you not to sit with me?”“No, actually.He said they’re not going to try to keep us apart anymore.He and Molly, I mean.I’m pretty sure everyone else will.”Rigel frowned over at the other table.“Wonder what he’s plotting now?”I put my hand over Rigel’s, making him look at me.“I don’t think he’s plotting anything.He’s not a bad guy, Rigel.Just.committed.He and Molly have been really nice to me, running interference with Allister and even their mom.I consider them friends.”“Friends.” I could feel jealousy and uncertainty from him.“One of whom can make you feel better, apparently.Whose DNA is helping those Healers concoct their damned cure [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]