[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
.“Well I was at Mickey’s and then I remembered my date with Steve.He’s taking me to the Bingo Hall again tonight and then maybe out for a night cap.” Her expression became wistful.“Such a sweet boy, that Steve.”“Granny, focus.” The officers took out their notebooks and everyone else listened amused, intrigued, and, probably for Sal, a little uncomfortable.“Yeah, OK.So I told Mickey to drop me off here so I could get all prettied up, you know, for my big date.”Josie clapped her hands.“Granny’s getting her groove back.”Ali snorted.“Granny never lost it.”Megan shot them both looks to shut them up.“So I showered, shaved my legs,” Jack and Dr.Ross exchanged amused looks, “and had just put my mask on when I heard these two yahoos come through the pantry window.So I hid in the kitchen under the table and when the big guy came by I zapped him in the butt.” She started laughing as did most of the crowd.“Big lug went down like a ton of bricks.Then the short guy came to check on his buddy and I tried to zap him too, but my zapper didn’t have enough juice left so he pulled me out from under the table by my hair and when he saw I was just a helpless little ol’ lady he let go of me.He asked me if I was OK, and I nodded then asked him for a hug because I was just so scared.”“Wait a minute, ma’am,” the young cop asked.“You asked a burglar for a hug.”“Well I didn’t think, ‘Come closer so I can knee you in the nuts would work.”The officer tried to hide his laughter, Jack didn’t.“You went for that, you idiot?” Jack said and Sal shook his head but then quickly changed it to a nod when Granny applied a little force with her foot to his lower region.“So continue from the hug,” the older, balding, officer instructed.“So, he hesitated for a minute and then I turned on the charm.” Several eyes were rolling.“And then when he came close enough I kneed him in the gonads and while he was nursing those I clobbered him with my crystal ball.” She gave a devious grin baring her false teeth.“I predict pain and a boyfriend named Bubba in his near future.”“And then you called me?” Jack asked.“Nope, first I taped up the little guy and then plugged in my zapper, just in case I needed it again.Then I taped up the fat guy best I could, put on some coffee and ate a bagel.” She turned to Megan.“You have really got to go grocery shopping, dear.I just about starved to death.”“Then you called me?”“No not yet.First, I had a good long talk with the little guy and told him if he ever messed with my granddaughter again I’d hunt him down and give him something in common with John Wayne Bobbit.You know the guy whose wife cut off his thingy.” Everyone nodded through their laughter and she continued.“Then I gave him a wedgie, just because he messed up my plans for my date, and then I called you.”“You go Granny,” Josie said and she and Granny did some secret diva handshake.“Yeah, I must say you kick butt, Granny,” Ali said and gave Granny a high five.Megan said nothing.She crossed the room and embraced the old woman and began to cry.Granny started laughing and made a show of flexing her wrinkled muscles.“Where did you get a stun gun?” Megan asked her.Granny smiled and said, “EBay.I would have gotten a grenade or something like that but I guess you have to have a permit or something and Mickey wouldn’t help me get one.”Thank God for that, Megan thought.At least he used his brain once this century.“Well I hate to be a party pooper, but I gotta get ready for my date.” She bowed for her audience, gave Jack a quick peck on the cheek, admired the young officers behind, and went upstairs.Jack talked with the officers and told them about Ted, the drugs, the money, all the previous mishaps with the Madrino’s.Dr.Ross offered to check out the Madrino brothers before the police carted them off while the officers questioned Megan on Ted’s whereabouts to which she told them the truth, that she had no clue.After the officers, the burglars and Granny and Steve had left Megan, Jack, Ali, Josie and Dr.Ross sat at the kitchen table and discussed the evening’s events over beer and iced tea for Jack.“I think you should load up your stuff and stay at my place for a while,” Ali told Megan and Megan shook her head.“No need,” Megan said, “I have my own bodyguard.”“Granny?” Josie asked and Megan pointed to Jack.“Oh,” Josie said, “I see.”“No it’s not like that.He chooses to sleep in his truck at the curb or in my driveway.” She locked eyes with Jack before going on.“No matter what I do I can’t coerce him to come inside.”Jack stood abruptly and surveyed the group.“Anyone hungry? I could go for a steak myself.”“You got a grill?” Dr.Ross asked Megan and she nodded.“Okay, how bout us boys go get the grub and you girls, well, just do what you do.We’ll cook and ya’ll can clean.”“Sounds good,” Ali said.Megan nodded and Josie said, “I don’t know about the cleaning part but everything else sounds fine [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]