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.If Ian wasn’t there, then Nicholas was going to….Ian had to be there.He had to be.He reached Ian’s bedchamber door and found it closed.He took a few deep breaths before he curled his fingers around the knob and turned.He pushed the door open, and the breath left his body in one exhalation of relief.There on the bed was his lover, eyes closed and appearing to be asleep.Nicholas took a few moments to compose himself before he quietly walked into the bedchamber and over to the wide bed.Ian looked so peaceful that Nicholas hated to wake him.His face was relaxed, kissable lips parted.A lock of his dark-blond hair hung over his eye, and long, thick lashes rested on his slightly pink, freckled cheeks.A fond smile tugged at the corners of Nicholas’s lips.His heart clenched at the sight of his sleeping beauty, so perfect and all his.He reached out and brushed the hair from Ian’s face.“I love you,” Nicholas whispered, bending to press his lips to Ian’s.Nicholas held the kiss for a moment before pulling back.Ian’s brows crinkled and his eyelids fluttered.With a sigh his eyes opened.“Oh,” he said sleepily.“Greetings.”“Good day,” Nicholas said, grinning.He bent and kissed Ian again.Ian’s lips parted on a sigh, inviting Nicholas’s tongue in to caress his.“I didn’t think you’d ever come,” Ian said, blinking slowly as he looked up at Nicholas.Nicholas shook his head, puzzling over Ian’s odd words.“I’ll always come for you.”Nicholas was pulled from sleep by a knocking on the door to his rooms.Needing to make some sort of change in his life, a year ago he had moved out of the garret room where he had spent most of his childhood and early adulthood, into a room in the main part of the house.He had also taken Charles’s advice about being more social and began to court the Earl of Lockton’s daughter, a pretty young woman with blue eyes and porcelain skin named Lucy.As much as Nicholas cared for her and she for him, there was no real bond between them, and Nicholas ended their association.His parents, who thought they were a fine match, had been outraged.It was then that Nicholas told them the truth of his sexual proclivities: he held no tender feelings for females.His mother and father greeted his declaration as they did almost everything else Nicholas said or did, with irritation, then resignation.Nicholas soon learned his parents did not care whom he courted as long as they were within the upper class.“You’ve a guest, son,” his mother said.“A good-looking young man is here to see you.”After Lucy came Gregory, the youngest son of Baron Fleming.Nicholas’s infatuation with Gregory ended when he realized how shallow and vain Gregory was.Naturally, Nicholas’s parents had loved Gregory and thought Nicholas mad for ending his courtship with the spoiled young heir.When Nicholas took up with a traveling musician named Anthony, Nicholas thought they were going to have conniption fits.Nicholas had liked Anthony’s free spirit and creativity, his ability to make up songs or tales on a whim, his soft voice when he sang of love lost.They had courted for a little less than a year before Anthony decided it was time to move on.He invited Nicholas to come with him, but Nicholas declined, not ready to leave behind everyone and everything he knew for an uncertain life.After Anthony, Nicholas did not jump into another courtship so quickly.He had cared very deeply for Anthony and wanted to mourn the loss of his companionship.It wasn’t until six months ago that a brown-haired, blue-eyed man named Philip had piqued Nicholas’s interest.Philip was a few years older than Nicholas and newly titled Earl of Thorne.Nicholas had repeated run-ins with him at Charles’s shop and was instantly attracted to the intelligent young earl.They had exchanged polite small talk, and Nicholas finally plucked up enough courage to suggest that if Philip was to pay a call on him it would be very welcome.“Coming,” Nicholas said, sitting up.As he did a book on histories fell to the floor with a thud.He staggered, not completely awake, bent to pick up the book, and placed it on the bedside table.He stared at himself in the looking glass, running his fingers through his hair before going to the door.He arrived downstairs to see his father chatting idly with Lord Thorne.He was stylishly dressed in a deep-red frock coat with embroidered gold accents, skintight breeches, and shiny, heeled shoes.William must have ascertained Thorne’s status because he was being very friendly.“I’ll warn you, Thorne, my son is a trifle flighty,” he said with a hearty laugh.“Three failed courtships in a year.”“Ahh well, perhaps he’s just a bit more careful in selecting a suitor.After all, mistresses and brothels aren’t everyone’s cup of tea.”Nicholas snorted, noting the subtle dig at his elder brother.Geoffrey’s philandering was well-known in the village.Nicholas felt sorry for Bridget being so publicly humiliated by his rake of a brother, but she handled the rumors and innuendo with grace and class.William’s laugher abruptly stopped.“Quite,” he said briskly.“Good day, Lord Thorne,” Nicholas greeted, a wide smile on his face, as he moved to stand beside his father.“Good afternoon.You said I should pay you a call, so here I am.” Philip took off his tricorn hat and made a sweeping bow.“I was just remarking to your father how hard it must be for some men to maintain a wife and a mistress.Damned complicated if you ask me, remembering birthdays and anniversaries, remembering whose name to call out during intimate moments.No, I think you have the right idea.Best be careful when choosing a spouse.”“Not to mention the scandal and expense of a divorce,” Nicholas joined in.William coughed.“Well, if you will excuse me, I have some correspondence to return.Thorne.” He inclined his head in a curt nod before disappearing to his study.“Oh, I do hope I didn’t say anything to offend his lordship,” Philip said with a gravity that didn’t reach his twinkling eyes.Nicholas erupted into laughter, forgetting decorum and hugging Philip tightly.“So, shall we go for a ride?” Philip inquired after they had calmed down.Nicholas looked at his new companion.There was a flutter in his heart that he hoped would continue to grow.All it needed was a little nourishing.“I’d like that.”NICHOLAS was seething.How could someone as intelligent and progressive as Philip think that book was anything other than pure pornographic filth? Nicholas struggled to get through it, pages and pages of humiliation and deplorable sex acts that only sought to shock, and Nicholas was shocked, shocked and offended by both the book’s content and his friend’s thoughts of it.“I cannot believe you just said that!” Nicholas raved.He and Philip were in the library of Philip’s home, Rose Hill Hall.It was by far the most luxurious room in the house, walls lined with shelves and each shelf stuffed with book upon book.A trio of plush chairs was situated in front of the fireplace.A writing desk with quills, inkpots, sealing wax, and pages of parchment spread on the surface was off to the left.The windows were opened wide, letting in a crisp breeze.The first time Nicholas had set foot in this room, he knew he had found a kindred soul.As much as Nicholas loved Charles, he was not as intellectually stimulating as Philip, although now Nicholas was reevaluating that stance.Charles may be a bit crass, but there was no way he would defend the book Nicholas and Philip were discussing: Justine, authored by Donatien Alphonse François.“There is no philosophical value to that garbage!” Nicholas strode over to the decanter of whiskey and poured himself a healthy measure.While he respected Philip’s opinion, he certainly didn’t share it, but he would hear his friend out
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